You only get one life, and you have the right to enjoy it.
The accusation of selfishness implies that it sucks to have kids, and not having kids is better, and therefore "selfish."
Because people without kids enjoy their lives more.
Epicurean Hedonism:
Epicureanism argued that pleasure was the chief good in life.
Hence, Epicurus advocated living in such a way as to derive the greatest amount of pleasure possible during one’s lifetime, yet doing so moderately in order to avoid the suffering incurred by overindulgence in such pleasure.
Emphasis was placed on pleasures of the mind rather than on physical pleasures.
Unnecessary and, especially, artificially produced desires were to be suppressed.
Since the political life could give rise to desires that could disturb virtue and one’s peace of mind, such as a lust for power or a desire for fame, participation in politics was discouraged.
Further, Epicurus sought to eliminate the fear of the gods and of death, seeing those two fears as chief causes of strife in life.
Epicurean Hedonism vs Modern Hedonism:
Epicurean hedonism, however, is actually based on moderation and self-control. Epicurus believed that over-indulgence would lead to pain. Instead, he and his followers followed a simple diet and did not aspire to riches, fame, or excessive material belongings.
If someone tried to follow an Epicurean lifestyle today, you would be more likely to find him sitting in a garden with some olives and cheese than at a fine-dining restaurant or all you can eat buffet.
For Epicurus, avoiding bodily and mental pain was key, and he focused on eliminating unnecessary fears and desires. He found pleasure instead from strong friendships, learning, and happy memories.
Some people might expect hedonists to be selfish, but Epicurus built a communal school and residence, sharing all he had with a group of students.
And because Epicureanism aims to remove unnecessary desires, true Epicureans do not take more than what they need or act out of greed. Epicurean hedonism, in its original form, is all about balance and quiet pleasure.
My ex-husband and I decided early on that we did not want to have children. I certainly wasn’t mature enough and having grown up in a family situation where my father was definitely King of the castle, I decided that I didn’t want any part of it. And I didn’t want to pass on those genes. We were called selfish, immature, kids would help our marriage stay together, and all other kinds of BS. Even when we were going through counseling before our divorce, my ex’s friends were saying well if you had a kid it would be better. No it would not have been better. I grew up in a dysfunctional household my parents spot like cats and dogs, but they held together because they were children of the depression era. I did not want to live like that. So today in this time, and what is happening, I am grateful that I don’t have children or grandchildren. I hate the thought of what’s being left to them. Thanks to this assine regime!
I was married for 48 years, we did not want, never had children. We had an awesome full life together